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Let's start with reviews.
Undead:
Was an astoundingly good film. Start with an early Peter Jackson gorefest. Add a smattering of extremely stylish set pieces a la Dusk till Dawn and a touch of John Carpenter's Vampires' surly sarcastic bluntness, and most amazingly of all a genuine plot. OK, this is still very much a splatter flick, and you're not likely to leave it questioning the reality of your own existence, but throughout you're still actually dying to see WHY the zombies are swarming instead of just totting up the number of different ways they get decapitated. And on top of this, all the way through it remains pants-wettingly funny. Go see now. Hold the family of your local cinema owner hostage whilst dropping the odd ear in the post until they are prepared to show it, if necessary. But go.
House of the Dead:
If I try to actually write an honest review of this I shall end up spasming on the floor unable to contain the outburst of vitriol. So I shall simply quote the Comic Store guy.
Worst.
Film.
Ever.
(Kris may at some point try to convince you that the Mangler 2 is still worse. In this he is completely and utterly wrong and probably in need of some kind of therapy involving electodes. The Mangler 2 was merely pitiful and could never hope to achieve an iota of the utter direness that this film effortlessly maintained throughout. In fact, it would be pushing the dictionary way beyond the call of duty to even describe the majority of the action sections as a film, as it appeared that someone had simply scooped up all the little offcuts from the cutting room floor and glued them together at random... but at least this spared you from the dialogue, that was under the illusion that it was meaningful, and the plot, that was under illusion that it existed. I want to go and claw my eyeballs out now)
Bubba Hotep
Was sold out, as is tomorrow's performance - hopefully the Hyde Park will get the hint and put on a full weeks run at some point in the future.
Conclusion
Undead: Good
House of the Dead: Bad
(just in case that wasn't quite clear enough)
Undead:
Was an astoundingly good film. Start with an early Peter Jackson gorefest. Add a smattering of extremely stylish set pieces a la Dusk till Dawn and a touch of John Carpenter's Vampires' surly sarcastic bluntness, and most amazingly of all a genuine plot. OK, this is still very much a splatter flick, and you're not likely to leave it questioning the reality of your own existence, but throughout you're still actually dying to see WHY the zombies are swarming instead of just totting up the number of different ways they get decapitated. And on top of this, all the way through it remains pants-wettingly funny. Go see now. Hold the family of your local cinema owner hostage whilst dropping the odd ear in the post until they are prepared to show it, if necessary. But go.
House of the Dead:
If I try to actually write an honest review of this I shall end up spasming on the floor unable to contain the outburst of vitriol. So I shall simply quote the Comic Store guy.
Worst.
Film.
Ever.
(Kris may at some point try to convince you that the Mangler 2 is still worse. In this he is completely and utterly wrong and probably in need of some kind of therapy involving electodes. The Mangler 2 was merely pitiful and could never hope to achieve an iota of the utter direness that this film effortlessly maintained throughout. In fact, it would be pushing the dictionary way beyond the call of duty to even describe the majority of the action sections as a film, as it appeared that someone had simply scooped up all the little offcuts from the cutting room floor and glued them together at random... but at least this spared you from the dialogue, that was under the illusion that it was meaningful, and the plot, that was under illusion that it existed. I want to go and claw my eyeballs out now)
Bubba Hotep
Was sold out, as is tomorrow's performance - hopefully the Hyde Park will get the hint and put on a full weeks run at some point in the future.
Conclusion
Undead: Good
House of the Dead: Bad
(just in case that wasn't quite clear enough)
no subject
And when they put Bubba Hotep on again [and they do normally when something manages to sell out at the festival] then I shall point it out to you and Kris if you don't appear to have spotted it yet.