Wendyhouse and Wheelchairs

So, in order to keep birthday commitments to friends, and just to get out of the house for a night and hold onto what's left of my sanity, I am venturing out to Wendyhouse on Saturday night. Although I swear there is a slight improvement in my various bodily aches, I'm still in quite delicate (!) shape, and doing much more than hobbling to the kitchen and back a few times a day is still my limit before the pains come on big time. So from a jokey suggestion ("Hey, the only way I'm going to make it is in a wheelchair") and sheer desperation to get out of the house (trips to the doctors and social services don't count) the joke has become a viable solution and I have booked a wheelchair loan from the nice* Shopmobility people.

The whole situation feels very strange though.

It keeps seeming sooooo cheeky to get a wheelchair cos they're for disabled people and I'm not disabled cos I ~can~ move about by myself so that makes me a fraud. Then it takes me 20 minutes to get upstairs to go the the loo and I suddenly have to admit that maybe I am, a bit, just for now. I don't like the idea though and I have no intention of getting used to it.

I think I'm most worried about the potential embarassment. I mean, I have no idea about wheelchair ettiquette... they never taught us that in school! I mean, do you have to stay in the chair all night? Are you mocking the efforts of the people that have been helping you if you occasionally get up and go for a mini-wander? (Especially relevant seeing as how it doen't do my knees any good to get them fixed in one position too long)Or is it ruder to sit there and expect people to push you round when you could actually walk bits of it yourself? But then how much should you take on yourself to do? Before I found out for certain thet there were lifts, I was thinking "Oh, well if anything is a major problem I can always get up or down stairs by myself and get someone to carry the chair." But seeing as how that's the bit that's really painful and the whole idea is to avoid hurting myself too badly (cos stairs are a real killer even when I'm doing good) then that seems to defeat the whole object of having the chair, so I ought to do it properly.

Now I'm not stupid. I know the answer is stay in the chair as much as you can, take full advantage of not having to walk, but don't feel you're not allowed to get up if you want to, just be very careful and take it easy. But that doesn't stop me sitting here wondering. Not least about how it would seem to someone who is permenantly in a wheelchair - how would someone who can't walk feel like someone who can walk (maybe only a bit, but still can) using a chair? Would they be pleased that someone's better off than them? Or would they feel like it was taking the piss? Or would they totally fail to give a rats arse one way or the other? Should I stop asking all these questions? Do I have any control left over typing fingers? Why is a duck?

I think what it comes down to is, I'm feeling slightly ridiculous using a wheelchair when I can actually walk, even though I'm sure it will be best healthwise. (Well, possibly not going out at all would be best for health physically, but I will end up drooling in a corner if I have one more night of tsunami puzzles and TV) Therefore I have come to an important decision. I shall make the whole experience, including the wheelchair, ridiculous as well to fit in. I was angling for a wheelchair with spikes but I think I shall just settle for masses of feathers instead - I have a nice purple feather boa and various additional purple plumes that were intended for some kind of winged outfit but can certainly help make me a gothic throne. And possible a riding crop or nice bullwhip to make my slaves behave themselves would be in order as well...

As someone once said: "Yes it's a stupid idea. That's all the more reason to do it"

*They seem nice on the phone anyway. Don't want to tempt fate by calling them nice then having to take it back when everything goes pear-shaped tomorrow ;-)