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Turns out that what I though was a bad back and a few strained muscles turned out to be the onset of a lovely little medical condition called Erythema Nodosum. I had to admit that something might be a teeny bit wrong when rather than going away, the pains got progressively worse over Christmas, and in places where I couldn't possibly imagine I could have pulled muscles (tell me, is it actually possible to sprain your thumb?) But still, huge house move, lots of lifting, knackered and run down, surely strange aches and pains were only to be expected. Then a couple of days after Christmas I found what I thought were a couple of insect bites on my legs. Again, this didn't altogether surprise me, as there's loads of ponds and marshy bits near my parent's house which are the not-so-secret breeding grounds of every kind of flyinh bitey thing under the sun, so whenever I go home to visit I end up with multicoloured lumps and blotches on my ankles... I swear the little bastards keep track of my movements and hold a big feast in my honour whenever I show up.
Anyway, a few days later I was living on neurofen for the aches in my joints, and the strange swellings had not only not gone down but were in fact multiplying and growing in size and ouchiness, and finally having to admit that this was not normal, and I probably should see a doctor. This decision was helped somewhat when after a crisis on New Year's Eve ("How can I drink champagne and celebrate when I probably have leprosy or smallpox or something...") I went out, got very nicely drunk, danced and snogged people all night (no for anyone that's worried, it's not contagious) and then spent the whole of the next day in absolute agony unable to move. So it was to the doctors on an emergency appointment the next day, and as soon as he saw my legs he gave an instant diagnosis. I didn't know whether to be terrified or relieved, though I guess on reflection it wasn't just all down to getting old.
(See, this is where it gets unfair. I go to the doctor with something apparently simple and innocuous such as a couple of spots on my leg, and I get the horrible medical condition with the long and scary name. Kris goes to the doctors with serious chest pains or a rash that won't disappear under a glass tumbler, and it always turns out to be nothing. Jammy bastard. But I can't complain about him too much at the minute cos he's been lovely and been looking after me in spite of the fact that it's his natural tendency to avoid anything broken that doesn't have a plug attached to it somewhere and clear and logial error messages, and the fact that he's ended up being occasional verbal punchbag the last couple of weeks when it all got too much and has showed nothing but kindness and monkeys)
It appears that my new visitor can have various causes and can even turn up without any warning at all. The lumps on the legs are the most obvious visible sign (in fact I think Erythema Nodosum might actually mean something like "that thing where you get weird lumps on your legs") but aches throughout your entire body are also caused by it, and these range from an irritating twinge to excrutiating agony. (On the plus side, my nice doctor has prescribed me the strongest painkillers available, so most of the time I'm not hurting too badly and am in a nice woosy daze - on the minus side they have to be eaten with food so any hopes of getting rid of the weight I put on over Christmas are out of the window, and looks like all the dieting I did last year might be for nothing) On top of this you have to "take it easy" meaning I can't do much apart from lie in bed or sit up with my feet up. Being a highly sneaky kind of condition, it doesn't hurt immediately if you do too much, it waits and hits you with it two hours later. Which means that even if you're feeling relatively ok and not hurting too much, you still can't get up and start doing things cos you have no idea what kind of backlash you might get later on in the day (and you always do) It's also highly illogical - for example, too much walking can make your wrist hurt (well, it does make a kind of sense, cos there's not a direct physical cause for the pain, so doing too much in general will make your whole body ache in general, and there's no rhyme or reason as to where the pain might be strongest, but I still consider it to be cheating of the lowest kind)
Good things:
1. It usually clears up by itself within about 6 weeks
2. It's a good excuse to sit and put your feet up without feeling guilty
3. It's actually worse at the beginning
Bad things:
1. Six weeks? SIX WEEKS??? That's like, forever! And I was meant to be setting up my own design company this month, and had all kinds of targets set, and now that's all gone to pot. Not to mention all the boxes that are still piled up in the dining room and all those irritating little round the house jobs that would usually take 5 minutes and now if I can manage them at all leave me wiped out for the rest of the day.
2. I am so bored I am so bored I am so bored... though at least now I have internet connection back so I can winge online at people about how bored I am, though unfortunately for only about 10 minutes at a time cos I can only sit here that long.
3 It HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURTS!
After various blood tests and X-rays it seems that the Erythema Nodosum is probably being caused by Sacrcoidosis. Sarcoid is a nasty little auto-immune thing that affects the lymph glands in the chest, causes E.N, and can affect various internal organs including the lungs. Luckily though it's not related to or caused by smoking (although I have to say the Leeds Chest clinic should not be allowed to book patients in for follow up appointments and further tests without at least giving you a hint as to why they're doing it... not the best thing to have turn up on the doorstep first thing on a Monday morning). I now have to wait until the 31st till I see the consultant to find out exactly what it is and what, if anything, can be done to treat it. Until then it's a diet of painkillers, and living with what Kris has decribed as leopardskin legs (although they are now merging into one huge blotch) and occasionally feeling like I'm approximately 200 years old.
What is extremely annoying is that one of my cure-alls for anything short of a gunshot wound to the head (alongside Witch Hazel) is Ecchinaea. (Well, even if you did get shot in the head I'd probably recommend witch hazel to help the wound heal nicely and ecchinaea to help prevent any other infections attacking while you were recuperating) Which is where the probelm lies - Ecchinaea is supposed to boost your immune system, so I always take it when I'm ill or even just run down to kind of give my body back up. But as far as I know, auto-immune conditions are ones where your own body turns on itself and your immune system starts to attack your cells and organs, in which case it would surely be a very silly thing to take anything that would in effect be sending it back up. Unless Ecchinaea only boosts good immune cells, not ones that have turned bad, like a hero in an action movie...
Although it might be back to my doctors tomorrow seeing as how my feet, ankles and lower legs have been steadily swelling and are now trying to do a highly convincing tree-trunk impression (actually, my feet look more like someone had over-inflated a rubber glove... I wish I had a webcam...) and once more I am not entirely sure that this is A Good Thing. Going to see if I can talk to the doctor on the phone rather than trying to drag myself to the surgery.
Anway, thank you for your attention during my speech on that fascinating subject "Other people's illnesses". I'm sure I shall be able to provide many exciting end entertaining updates as things variously hurt, cease to hurt, and swell up...
Anyway, a few days later I was living on neurofen for the aches in my joints, and the strange swellings had not only not gone down but were in fact multiplying and growing in size and ouchiness, and finally having to admit that this was not normal, and I probably should see a doctor. This decision was helped somewhat when after a crisis on New Year's Eve ("How can I drink champagne and celebrate when I probably have leprosy or smallpox or something...") I went out, got very nicely drunk, danced and snogged people all night (no for anyone that's worried, it's not contagious) and then spent the whole of the next day in absolute agony unable to move. So it was to the doctors on an emergency appointment the next day, and as soon as he saw my legs he gave an instant diagnosis. I didn't know whether to be terrified or relieved, though I guess on reflection it wasn't just all down to getting old.
(See, this is where it gets unfair. I go to the doctor with something apparently simple and innocuous such as a couple of spots on my leg, and I get the horrible medical condition with the long and scary name. Kris goes to the doctors with serious chest pains or a rash that won't disappear under a glass tumbler, and it always turns out to be nothing. Jammy bastard. But I can't complain about him too much at the minute cos he's been lovely and been looking after me in spite of the fact that it's his natural tendency to avoid anything broken that doesn't have a plug attached to it somewhere and clear and logial error messages, and the fact that he's ended up being occasional verbal punchbag the last couple of weeks when it all got too much and has showed nothing but kindness and monkeys)
It appears that my new visitor can have various causes and can even turn up without any warning at all. The lumps on the legs are the most obvious visible sign (in fact I think Erythema Nodosum might actually mean something like "that thing where you get weird lumps on your legs") but aches throughout your entire body are also caused by it, and these range from an irritating twinge to excrutiating agony. (On the plus side, my nice doctor has prescribed me the strongest painkillers available, so most of the time I'm not hurting too badly and am in a nice woosy daze - on the minus side they have to be eaten with food so any hopes of getting rid of the weight I put on over Christmas are out of the window, and looks like all the dieting I did last year might be for nothing) On top of this you have to "take it easy" meaning I can't do much apart from lie in bed or sit up with my feet up. Being a highly sneaky kind of condition, it doesn't hurt immediately if you do too much, it waits and hits you with it two hours later. Which means that even if you're feeling relatively ok and not hurting too much, you still can't get up and start doing things cos you have no idea what kind of backlash you might get later on in the day (and you always do) It's also highly illogical - for example, too much walking can make your wrist hurt (well, it does make a kind of sense, cos there's not a direct physical cause for the pain, so doing too much in general will make your whole body ache in general, and there's no rhyme or reason as to where the pain might be strongest, but I still consider it to be cheating of the lowest kind)
Good things:
1. It usually clears up by itself within about 6 weeks
2. It's a good excuse to sit and put your feet up without feeling guilty
3. It's actually worse at the beginning
Bad things:
1. Six weeks? SIX WEEKS??? That's like, forever! And I was meant to be setting up my own design company this month, and had all kinds of targets set, and now that's all gone to pot. Not to mention all the boxes that are still piled up in the dining room and all those irritating little round the house jobs that would usually take 5 minutes and now if I can manage them at all leave me wiped out for the rest of the day.
2. I am so bored I am so bored I am so bored... though at least now I have internet connection back so I can winge online at people about how bored I am, though unfortunately for only about 10 minutes at a time cos I can only sit here that long.
3 It HUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURTS!
After various blood tests and X-rays it seems that the Erythema Nodosum is probably being caused by Sacrcoidosis. Sarcoid is a nasty little auto-immune thing that affects the lymph glands in the chest, causes E.N, and can affect various internal organs including the lungs. Luckily though it's not related to or caused by smoking (although I have to say the Leeds Chest clinic should not be allowed to book patients in for follow up appointments and further tests without at least giving you a hint as to why they're doing it... not the best thing to have turn up on the doorstep first thing on a Monday morning). I now have to wait until the 31st till I see the consultant to find out exactly what it is and what, if anything, can be done to treat it. Until then it's a diet of painkillers, and living with what Kris has decribed as leopardskin legs (although they are now merging into one huge blotch) and occasionally feeling like I'm approximately 200 years old.
What is extremely annoying is that one of my cure-alls for anything short of a gunshot wound to the head (alongside Witch Hazel) is Ecchinaea. (Well, even if you did get shot in the head I'd probably recommend witch hazel to help the wound heal nicely and ecchinaea to help prevent any other infections attacking while you were recuperating) Which is where the probelm lies - Ecchinaea is supposed to boost your immune system, so I always take it when I'm ill or even just run down to kind of give my body back up. But as far as I know, auto-immune conditions are ones where your own body turns on itself and your immune system starts to attack your cells and organs, in which case it would surely be a very silly thing to take anything that would in effect be sending it back up. Unless Ecchinaea only boosts good immune cells, not ones that have turned bad, like a hero in an action movie...
Although it might be back to my doctors tomorrow seeing as how my feet, ankles and lower legs have been steadily swelling and are now trying to do a highly convincing tree-trunk impression (actually, my feet look more like someone had over-inflated a rubber glove... I wish I had a webcam...) and once more I am not entirely sure that this is A Good Thing. Going to see if I can talk to the doctor on the phone rather than trying to drag myself to the surgery.
Anway, thank you for your attention during my speech on that fascinating subject "Other people's illnesses". I'm sure I shall be able to provide many exciting end entertaining updates as things variously hurt, cease to hurt, and swell up...